.Wednesday, April 26, 2006 ' 7:52 PM Y
i love being around you
well its been long since i'v last blogged,anyway all poly's are officially open now.hmm lets see recently i'v been kinda busy with school and stuff.and p.s ITS REALLY TIRING.anyway life in ngee ann is kinda boring i guess, maybe because i'm in ECE not business studies.damn, i hate the subjects alot.and DAMN there's like no hot girls in ECE.WTH? hello i don't want to spend the next 3 years without hot girlsalrights enought elmo! descency is virtue, i shall refrain myself from such *^*($&# things =Xanyway its true, i don't like ECE, and to be franki stayed up till 4.30am brooding over it and some other stuff.seriously ECE isn't my type, they make me draw things when i don't even know how to write well. so clever of them to do that.anyway i'm gonna take my O'levels english again this year,and hopefully i'll do well and get into a course i want.ohya i used to think NP was filled with Regent peeps,but i was wrong, there's like SOOO FEW. oh my...all i do is hang out with xing,edwin,chris and norman.mhmm but i have to comment that. NGEE IS FILLED WITH CHICKS.see 'NGEE ANN' NOT 'ece' damn.and yes i just love walking in the atrium and library, it just makes me go GAGA. hahahah ooops, anyway yes! DESCENCY.ahem.ohwells lets see my class has like 20 guys and 2 girls? mhmmm COOL,maybe i can go gay for a change huh?and yes i'm making lots of friends now, damn my class is crazy.THANK GOD THEY DO DOTA. aahahah,anyway there's this really strange thing that happened today.3 years back i was attached to this girl, and yes she mentioned to me aboutthis guy who keeps harressing her, and guess what.LOL THAT GUYS IN MY CLASS,i was like erm... you're from kent ridge right? hey you know debbie?LOL yaya that one, OHHH SO ITS YOU, i was the guy attached to herwhile you liked her, AHAAHAH COOL HUH? anyway he's a nice guyand we're our class jokers, hahax.everyone has moved on already, and here i am still stucked in my thoughts.schools started, and i'm still stumped.what is it thats really important to me.. why am i so indecisive.why can't i just move on with life, what am i feeling inside.you know this feeling sure is kinda f*cked up.HAO FAN ARHHH...somebody help me.no one dies a virgin cos life f*cks us all.you know, im seriously giving it some serious thoughts but, i'm not getting anywhere, someone tell me what to do, talk to me, will you?ohwelss enough of this shit, i shall rant another day.anyway i saw you today, but all i did was just hide.you know what? i don't know why but at the slightest bit of dangerall i do is run, and run. i don't even face it. i just run away.maybe thats all i'm supposed to do.run like how forest gum did.girl i miss you,i really do... talk to me will you?i don't know what to do. and i don't know what i'm feelingi'm confused, and i don't want to lose you.[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]are the things we want the things we need? if so, why do i feel this way.
. ' 2:20 AM Y
i love being around you
I HATE SCHOOL;tell me whats important to me, tell me[`\__JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]
.Sunday, April 23, 2006 ' 11:40 PM Y
i love being around you
Oh my schools starting tommorrow, DARNi'm gonna miss everyone; take care peeps [`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]somethings are better left unknowngirl get well soon
.Thursday, April 20, 2006 ' 3:46 AM Y
i love being around you
ohh man today i made my way done to npjust to install some shit stuff, anyway DAMN i felt so embarresed while registering for the installationg thing.as u all know, i don't know my NP id and password.but this morning i managed to find the paper regarding my id and pw.so yes, its obvious i'v never signed in before.and just for your infomation, when u do that installign thingyou need to log in to your account.anyway i queued up, and when i was up next, the lady said'take out your laptop and get ready to log in'so i took out my lappy and took out the paperteaching me how to sign in. and OH MY GODi type wrong password and all, then the lady just shout,NEXT!. WTF, then i had to go all the way behind.ehh no fair lo, just cause its my first time, you need not be so mean!naggy granny. GRRRRRR =/anyway whats even more screwed is, my laptop uses windows HOME. not pro.so instead of installing 4 programs, they installed 2 onlyand Y$#^@%! on my paper they put, PLEASE COME BACK TML, 8am.WTH, whats wrong with you people! damnit.ohwells after np, i went to play pool till like 1.30am?i guess its better to keep myself busy rather then just staying at home.it sure is a good way to keep me pre-occupied.anyway when i came home, i had a good chat with marcus.well i guess things aren't going that smoothly.be it me or him, everything has been kinda screwed up lately.it seems all this quarrel and shit has been happening alot.and yes, friends out there; cherish one another. and thank you marcus for exchanging advices.will take them into consideration, smiles everyone.anyway last night i had dream, was it sweet, horrifying, sadi don't know, but it sure has confused me alot.and yes i want to know the ending, unfortunately i was awaken by a phone call. DAMNITwhat did it mean, its really hard to choose between things you care for.why do i feel this way, grrrr...Dear Lord, please give me that same dreami want to know what happened in the end. what did i decide on eventually.what was it i really wanted.[`\____JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\____x]how are you?
.Wednesday, April 19, 2006 ' 1:26 AM Y
i love being around you
yes i'm sick, go ahead and start laughing. looks like i aint that strong after all,but damn, this pain is unbearable.but i can't blame anyone but myself.4 bars of kinda bueyno, 1 whole tube of jelly beansand 1 big pack of strawberry poky, doesn't make you fatit kills you to be precise, and this recent cravingof chocolates, ITS STOPPING RIGHT HERE.anyway im down with flu -ithink?actually no, lets see i'v got a really really sore throat.this really annoying chunk of phlegm, a on and off runny nosea aching body, a fever -ithink; thats because im freaking cold and my head feels hot.and a MEGA PAIN MIGRAINEIT IS UNBEARABLE I TELL YOU, what could be worse then thisits just this slitting headache which is out to kill you.on second thoughts who knows, it might no be just migrainesmaybe my whole heads infested with maggots, just like what happened to granny doctor hehe. and to add on, i'v got this allergy thats happening on my hand.its not a rash, but i shall not eleborate,i think im dying; nods.erm if i do, please attend my funeraland do not be late; and yes i demand everyone to sing'Heaven is a wonderful place, filled with glory and praise''i want to see my Father's face, Heaven is a wonderfull place'and the second verse goes on with you all changing the word 'wonderful'and please be sure to have a phrase which includes eLmo, thank you.Ohwells enought of crapping already, *bang bang bang*oops sorry i'v got this nerve problem, my left hand just hit my right handarrhhh damnit, anyway YES thursday is my last day of work!and i got day off tml :) ,this 4 weeks has been really dronning.and i'm glad its coming to an end, i'm going shopping!!YAYYY -screams- *jumps on bed* YESSanyway schools starting next week, hmm finally?excited? -no ; but hey its something to look forward too.hopefully i'll be able to get on with life quickly,and yes, then i'll see whats important in my life.anyway today's boring i guess, i went for a medical check updamnit i costed me $32 , actually i costed my mum $32, so i don't care..i worked for like 1/2 day and then i went to play pool..well how happy can my day be, im sick and im feeling awful.actually i didn't play much either, i actually watched 2 movies there.my whole bodies aching, and my heads spinning around.its like i jsut drank a dozen cups of vodka,ohwells with regards to someone, somebody,something, youthat never came across my mind, i'm not sure of thingsbut i guess its me, sorry? i already did. maybe i'm too soft hearted, why is it always me who gives in.it takes two hands to clap, and i'v done my part. if you don't appreciate it, its alright, but neither do i need people to speak of for mei'v got my pride, and i'll stick to it. it all just comes down to one word'you'. i still think of you, but i don't wish too.i still pray for you,and yes i miss you.and this dreams of you, i don't want anymorehow are you? are you alright? hows life?i tell everyone that i don't,not anymore, but i still doits not that i don't, its that i want to move on. do i have a choice? this was a game i couldn't afford to losebut all in all, i still did.i don't know whats happening, everyday i ask myselfare the things i want the things i need? whats really important to me, and whats not.where will i go from here on? i'm satisfied with my life.but thats what everyone says, but hey life's never satisfyingto be frank i'm confused over many things.i don't even know what i am feeling inside, is what i'm doing right or wrong?i don't want to lose anyone, i don't to somebody out there, drop from the sky, pop your head out of the ground.where are you, i need you. i don't know what i feel..but will you just sit next to me? will you.i promise i'll practice my guitar and sing lullabies to you.things are better, but do things just stop here?If God planned, so be it. i'll give thanks with a thankful heart.to somebody will you be my companion,will you be my confidente.will you be my cup of coke? -tea.baby if you opened your eyes, you would have seen that everything was beautifulthats because i was right next to you, but baby if you realised,don't look forward but look at me.[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]one last cry.
.Monday, April 17, 2006 ' 2:38 AM Y
i love being around you
OH MY GOD, i woke up at 3.30 today
thats like more then 10hrs of sleep, i don't usually sleep till that late.
geesh age sure is catching up on me, i'm deprived of sleep
what i one day i don't even wake up.
Don't worry im sure sparky will give me a big fat smoochy.
just like sleeping beauty, but this time round call it sleeping handsome :)
anyway yes i rotted at home all day long;
it was like pratically raining cars and buses
i mean cats and dogs, errr ice cubs and rocks...
computers and toilet bowls...ehh sorry kinda got out of control..
pardon me for my weird adrenaline, i suffer from spastic syndromes..
LOL DAMN...alrights thats not funny,
ohwells ya i stayed home the whole day; using the computer
and hell it was boring, anyway i slept again in the evening,
i'm freaking tired so i'm gonna make my post short today.
anyway yes one more week of work and yes! my 1k + .
lets see i got a long shopping list to tick,
no.1 ipod nano, 2gb
no.2 drum set
no.3 a new handphone.
no.4 a new pair of shoes
no.5 a new cue set.
YEAH MANNN and including the remaining $300+
and the long list of debtors which totals to $500. i am rich!
and see, i think im going to be a millionare before i reach 21 =X
AAHAHAHA..
to whoerver this concerns; if you ever read this,
i'm glad we managed to sort things out, and hey i'm not gonna let you go.
you need me, and i need you too. so ROARRR *handcuffs you*
atleast now you kinda see and feel what i see and feel,
HMMM THAT DOESN'T SOUND RIGHT.. anyway yes.
schools starting, and then from there on, i'll see whats really
important in my life.
poot-taa, HAHA YOU GOT SCHOOL LALALA , have fun POOT -farts ;
loser stop talking and get your but in msn! ;teddy HAHA you noob, see without me u all lose =X ;
ivan HOR HORR i know what u did that NIGHT lo, nothing can escape my eyes.
ingrate you idiot, watch out i'm gonna bite real hard ; somebody take care.
Don't just see what i see,
but feel what i feel too,
Understand me, for i want to understand too
[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]
one last cry
moving forward and never turning back, no regrets,
but i'll pray that everything will come back one day.
.Sunday, April 16, 2006 ' 4:44 AM Y
i love being around you
Lets see today was just like any other day,
i mean what more could i expect?
could it be any better, could be any worse;
one word, yes life is 'different' now; and all i can do is face it.
anyway today i kinda woke up at 1? well for a bad reason indeed,
well my dad came into my room to sleep on my brothers bed,
and damnit, unfortunately he started snoring, WTH
that sound; man its really droning. its not a pain in the ass, but in the ears.
i was like shouting 'DADDDY' and there he goes,
he continues to snore away in slumber land.
after i woke up, the usuals, brushed my teeth, turned on my computer
and yes it was boring; but today i kinda played for -DreamZ- as a sub again,
damn i'm really sorry guys, i think i let you guys down, in that match
i guess was the burden of the team, and i feel guilty!!
ohwells, i think i need to train more, i wanna be thier 6th player!!
anyway after playing for them, i went to century to play pool.
and yes sharik and javier came down today too,
anyway i played against lionel, sharul and sweehao.
LOL damnit i lost all, but i had fun
omg i was winning swee hao 4-0 and i lost 4-5, HAHAHA
ohwells ingrate came down too. thats cause we planned to catch a movie.
anyway things are different now, whenever she comes down
its swee swee swee, peter peter peter, and sense jealousy? yes.
but what can i do, she doesn't even need me..i don't even dare to talk to her now,
and all they do is just laugh when i lose,
anyway something happened today, edwin was still having a match with his friends.
and ingrate, peter and swee, weren't happy cause they'v been waiting for a very long time.
anyway i told them to go off first because taxi's don't take 5 people,
and how do u expect me to leave edwin behind, he's a friend after all right?
you don't expect me to leave people in the lurch.
one very pissed scenerio was;
eLmo: Hey peter you all go off first, i'll wait for edwin
peter: alrights.
*minutes later* , phone rings
swee hao: oie faster come down la, you want go annot
nothing wrong with the phrase, but i disliked his manners.
he was shouting and there were signs of descentment.
you don't need to show attitude cause you aint happy;
HELLO i already told peter i'll wait for edwin
and yes, i thought you guys were going to Lot 1 to watch,
unfortunately i wasn't there when u guys decided
but hey u all kept asking me, ehh Lot 1 got bus go annot?
Lot 1 got what time slot; YES THERE IS
Lot 1 is nearer to all of thier houses, why go to westmall?
so instinctively you would think; they would go to Lot 1and more the less, edwin was the one who checked the time slot, and he said Lot 1
But hey they left earlier then me and edwin, and yes we thought it was Lot 1
so we took a cab down, and when we reached
Ed: hey where u all now?
Ed: Cinama? where u all, why cannot see you all
Ed: HUH westmall?
WTH WHY SUDDENLY GO WEST MALL
and u guys never even bother to tell us,
its like you keep asking for 'A' , and all of a sudden 'B' comes in.
and yes we had to rush down in a cab with just 10minutes left
2 cab fares which cause more then $10.
its really irritating when such things happen.
and yes when we reach, they don't even bother to 'HI'
they just walked in and we followed, WTH?
and wow, peter and sweehao must had been having fun
just flirting around with her? COOL.and they even got to seen next to here, where she's in the middleand yes; elmo's sitting right far far away from them
but hey theres nothing i can do either -ithinkeven if i told you how i felt, i don't even think it would matteri think it would just piss you off, hahax.
When i told you, that i would wait till poly start, and see whats important in my life
you said 'ME' 'ME' , i wish too, i don't wanna lose you either girl. trust me,
i already lost someone important in my life, i don't wanna lose you either.Anyway Eight Below was GREAT, i loved it.
its a great show to catch, and yes if i ever watch a movie with anyone else
please remind me to go to toilet right before the movie.
its dronning when you miss out minutes just to go to the toilet half way. AND HEY I WANT TO GET A HUSKY TOO!! THEY ARE JUST TOOO
ADORABLE AND CUTE!!
Ohwells thats enough of my ranting and happiness,
and i shall not eleborate on it further, and yes i'll post some cool topics SOON.
so stayed tuned guys, start heating my chat box will youchat chat chatt :)And ohya its really boring when you lose to noobs in dota;losing to pro's aren't that bad, but when you lose to NOOBSand because of stupid mistakes, like having 2 NEWBIEs on your teamits just really $@%!#% , they just drag the whole team downand yes damnit, we were losing at the start, but we were turning overthanks mr noob teammate, your mistake caused us the whole game.all the while it was a 3 v 5 game. DAMN.
xing, hey girl if you need anything i'm here ya ; Loser catch up soon ;
Ted Good luck in the finals tml ;edwin thanks ; ingrate sorry ;
butta! yes get lost in your thoughts, your thoughts of ME :) , catch up soon ya
somebody i can't help but worry about, if you wondered Good Nights ;
-DreamZ- Good luck in your competition tml, all the ways peeps
And yes i realised theres been an overwhelming
load of quarrels and sadness recently, EVERYONE JUST CHILL OUT
have a break have kitelmo. :) smiles everyone
Don't just see what i see ,but feel what i feel
When you don't need me, i'll stand aside
but when need me, i'll be there for you
[`\__JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]
She doesn't need me,
.Saturday, April 15, 2006 ' 4:27 AM Y
i love being around you
I am exhausted; lets see i'm like sleeping really lateanyway life isn't that bad after all; i'v decided to put things aside till poly starts, yayyanyway yesterday i met up with glared and team. SAKAE!! weee it was great think? and to think of it..those faggots tried to trick me into eating wasabi,i went to piss and when i came back, all the food i ordered were goneonly left with one pathetic mushroom which looked erm, NICE?first sight; wth? did someone put it in thier mouth, why so wet onethen teddy being the asshole said 'they all eat finish, i hao xing keep one'GENGSTER! when i put it in my mouth all start to humchio already. grrrthank God i'm a clever boy now =X i spit it, and to thinkJOEY freaking stuff alot of wasabi inside. its like WTHAnyway we had to wait for lei, till 9.30that fag had some shitty wedding dinner; his sister's getting marriedohwells after we met up, we went down to e-games; they all had a competition match; GO -DreamZ- , i know without me u all sure lose =XAHAHAAHAHAH; u need to pro elmo.anyway they won that match; the opponents were . . .NOOB? LOLohwells they're playing in sundays finals, good luck peeps.Ohya at E-games i saw this really crappy CS team, holy mama, its a full team and they got trashed by a mixed team,though i quit cs already BUT, i shall repeat myselfNOOBS OUT THERE, seriously if you can't achieve anythingFREAKING HELL QUIT GAMING LA...ahah noobs. damn i love suaning people.but its the fact; the problem is either with you or your team,if you can't achieve any thing, don't even bother to play. don't be like ALVIN CHAN, no.1 noob, and he tells us he's not theNOOB HE USED TO BE; omg thats frigging funny. When i see scores in recent competitions, his team is like. right at the bottomseeing that really makes my day; HAHAAnyway i'v been thinking, all my life i'v achieved so many things.Lets see to recap; When i played table tennis, i'v gone all the way to national level.Basketball i'v represented phhps and regent.Soccer i even made my way to uk to train for a week,In gaming; i'v won many many competitoons.SEE LOOK AT ME, i'm so clever. and hell yeah, i want to achieve more stuff in life.Up next shall be Under 21 pool champion :Pi not only want to excel in my interest, but as a good friend, a good lover, a good sona good husband next time, and be a great dad :)hmm i'v also been thinking if i should go back to gaming,its freaking addictive!!! The past few days has been rough,really caughted up with thingsand still brooding over many things, but hey; i realised somethingactually there many people who care for me, HELL YES, i'm enjoying myself.regards to all my friends; smile alwaysand thanks for being there me. you know friends are friends,its not like when u go to primary, you make friends, and when u grad, you walk seperate ways.so on and so forth for secondary sch and the days of you life.friends are always there, its just that u need to open you eyes.sometimes the times you need are the one thing u can't see.to someone out there, i'm sorry; i wanna go out with you tml too!! its not that i don't want to reply your sms, but i don't know how...i don't dare, i'm afraid; and things seem different between us..i still care about you; i really do.but it seems you don't need me..to someone out there, are you alright; i worry for you. take care.ingrate sorrrryyy; butta HAHA, why did u come back, i was happy when u got lost,i was prayin u'd never find your way back; loser u suck -haha, catch up soon :) ;tedddyyy haha good luck for your match, stop eating so much la.. ^!#%!#$ ;ivan kawaii-ee kawaii-ee GOOD LO, zhong se qing you, i don't care next outing YOU ARE BRINGING ME AND TED ALONG, scared kawai-ee fall for me right!;denis HAHA SO HOWW? is it a YES or NO... ;xing!!! if u need me i'm here ya :)you, take care of yourself will you, i miss ya.P.s I LOVE THIS SONG,not because it brings me memoriesBUT HELL YEAH, i really love it.enjoy peeps :) [`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]My decision:i'll wait till poly starts, and i'll see whats really important to me.smiles everyone :) ;clever me.
.Friday, April 14, 2006 ' 4:59 AM Y
i love being around you
Schnapppi!! :)Nights X) , [`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]Take care my friends; smiles.
.Thursday, April 13, 2006 ' 1:15 AM Y
i love being around you
work sure is boring; and when i say it. i mean itthey put you in a room to decompose so that maggots will eat you away.NO PLEASE; i don't want to end up like my grandma..i know her heads be-a-u-ti-ful , but no thanks, i'll admire it from a distance.Anyway after work i went for training again; but things are kinda different.now i have to 'pay' for training; thats because the BIG boss; aint happy.ohwells ingrate came down to past time again, and once again sorry;i'm just not in the mood to do anything. this shit is getting all over me.more the less im fustrated because i just lost $15 to peter... damnit,and she doesn't need me to entertain her no more;i think i'v been a bad bad friend, i'v been thinking muchand i'm sorry; maybe i failed to understand youi'v got to admit i was harsh; maybe i used the wrong approach.but it was just in a spur of the moment thing;all i can say is, sorry.i'm sorry for what i'v done.maybe i am an embarressment to you;everything i say or do must have thrown your face,when you were with me, you could no longer hold your head up with pride.for all i did was disgrace you.yes i am childish but thats the way i am; i am immatured and if you can't accept it then don'ti won't bring further embarressment to you.unlike your friends who are all grown up and matured,i am not like one of them.yes; i am deprived of childhood,to be frank i still talk to my imaginary friend everyday; EVERYDAYhe's name is called ; Daddy and yes we talk about everything.but whenever i talk to him about you, tears just to roll down gently,suprising? no cos i'm yawning. and i still talk to Him every night; because thats the only thing i can do now. and if i shout and scream that i miss you, it wouldn't make a difference thats because i locked myself in a sound proof room, way to go elmo :)girl, you need me, no more.with me all i can give is oat from a wooden spoon.but with them you get rice from a silver spoon.together with them you laught at me; not knowing how bad it hurts.i'm afraid to talk to you; i am, thats why i stay away when you're near.where are you when i need you.[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]when you don't need me; i'll stand asidebut when you need me; i'll be there for you
.Wednesday, April 12, 2006 ' 1:25 AM Y
i love being around you
Well well; lets see i didn't go to work today, YES!and lady boss is angry; awww...ohwells, i wasn't quite in the right mindset when i woke up,7:30: ohhh damnit i don't want to go work; no please7.35: ahh how how how?7.50: starts to plan what tell boss8.00: alrights i'll tell boss i just woke up late.8.30: *maid comes in* J wake up; wake up, me: ahh go away...8.45: J u today no SCHOOL ar? ;aiya later la...9.oo: J you no school ar? duwan go la..let me sleep.AHAHAHA school :S anyway i woke up at 1pm; damn i think i should go to work.*calls boss* :ehh boss sorry ar, i woke up late..i think i go down for 1/2 day.1.15: waa crap can dun go annot...ted ask me play match for -DreamZ-1.16: *sms* boss i don't think i going down already, i feel kind of lethargic today1.20: *reply* this is not a acceptable attitude; you better come down now.1.25: *calls her* ehh boss are, i really duwan work today..then she starts with her grandma storry; but theres this phrase'this is what i advise la, i leave the decision to you'HELL YES! of course my decision is NO!! im not going!...ahahahai think i'm in deepshit already; what if she complains to my dad :/Anyway yes; i stayed at home to train, and yes! i played for -DreamZ- once again.the legendary player ELMO =X, and OBVIOUSLY we won right..thats because got ELMO, so not ted... *VICTORY* then when u press nextWAHHH -DreamZ-G_G has the top score..HELLO PEOPLE THATS ME =XME LEII...im top..lalala anyone interested in my replay ...maybe i can be thier 6th player..LOLsince life is different now; i might as well change it again. we'll see how.Well after the match i went to train pool again; and ingrate came down to past time.sorry ingrate, just sorry; i think there's a problems with me. but its just strange.i'm moodless; and i don't know what to say; everything i say just shuts me up.and dammit, i lost like a fag today..seriously..i shall comment on my game play todayi'm pissed, and im freakin fustrated with myself.Trust thats a very big word indeed. What is trust in the first place,That means not having doubts about someone;but in this situation; that word no longer lingers in our prescences.what stands before us are just;doubts,lies,and more lies.to begin with that was all we ever had; whatever i was thinking,it was all just stage performance; people who acted, just recited the script, and gave thier big fake smiles and stupid lies. but how did things turn out this way; hadn't you known me from the very start.you don't judge people, based on other peoples opinions; you judge them with your heart.if you ever see this; you're happy; i'm happy for you too,but you need me, no more.with me all i can give is oat from a wooden spoon.but with them you get rice from a silver spoon.when you don't need me; i'll stand aside
but when you need me; i'll be there for you[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]-she doesn't need me.
.Tuesday, April 11, 2006 ' 1:10 AM Y
i love being around you
i'm pooped; there goes my tire.
flat,tired,exhausted, what ever words you have to describe.
yes; the words 'LOW BATT' appears on my fore head.
but before those two words comes another two; 'HEY LOSER'
well works boring; and i'm glad i finished the accounts
for my first company :)
ohwell, after work i went for training again. damn its tiring.
but atleast it keeps my off things;
anway i lost to edwin again, what i was playing: crap.
and the score of 1-5 suits me best; because losers were never meant to win.
losers don't go playin to win,
the go for the sake of losing..
anyway i played against the swee brothers,
won swee hao 2-1 ; and got trashed 7-1 by swee chuan..
and the 1 came from a miss shot by him,
anway he asked me to go down to train tml; swee chuan
if you ever see this; thanks, i won't let you down
thats because i'm aiming much higher.. :)
Ever been to court? ever seen the judge give his verdict;
'I sentence you to life imprisonment' ,for what reasons i don't know
but the world revolves and there's a reason for everything.
why are the guilty ones getting scort free,
and the innocent being wronged. One reason for it
thats because people take sides; for one reason or another.
and when a innocent person gets charged for something he has done,
what can he say; so no matter how clear his consciences are, theres nothing he can do.
onces the judge gives his sentence, no matter how much he pleads, its not use
for the mindset of the judge is set on just giving the sentence and nothing else.
Ever heard of the phrase 'tiao jing huang he.. ye xi bu qing'
no matter how hard you try, you won't be able to prove your innocence.
But here comes the catchy part; why do the guilty ones get scort free.
i have no idea; maybe because everyone turned thier backs on the innocent.
everyone has take taken sides for the wrong the reasons, not the sincere ones.
and yes; the next question is why did they do it?
to get what they want; people resort in scheming methods.
and thats signals the start of a game called 'manipulation'
i have to admit, it was on purpose; -sorrry? *not.i wanted you back,i wanted to hurt him.yes. thats me.
ever heard a wolf under a sheeps skin; -think about it.
believe me or not.it matters no more.
the sentence has be passed down.
i am guilty, but i have a reason for all this sayings.
one cannot change the mindsets of others; so the matter of yes or no, doesn't even exist.
to be exact. sorry aint gonna help. because i don't mean it.
this is the real me, believe me; you have yet to see the 'truth'
and if you don't know; thanks you for your doubts.
you are much appreciated. but i this is me. bite me. hate me.dispise me.get angry with me.
ingrate sorry i didn't accompany you, hope you understand; edwin thanks for being there.
butta, thanks for being there for me, with deepest gratitudes;
to people who cheered me up just now; thanks for the advice and the open ears for my droning past.
xing thanks for understanding me ; ivan for the win it shall be; ted good luck tml;
[`\___Jux.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x\]
trust? ;i always did, but enought of this cherade.;explaining wouldn't make a difference.
.Sunday, April 09, 2006 ' 12:51 AM Y
i love being around you
i'm exchausted; and i'm deprived of sleep.
well today, competition was great i guess?
i won one; 3-1,it was suppose to be 3-0 though. damnit.
and i lost the remaining two matches 3-0 , 3-0
i could have lost 3-1 , 3-1 but damn. too many mistakes
and i admit they were much better.
and i actually had a chance to to advance to the next phase =X
lets see in my first match i was trembling like crazy
but that was when i was leading 2-0, the shot was the last shot.
that would make me win 3-0
and damnit i took a very long time to aim.
and so yes there i was standing, and my leg trembling
ohh freaking hell; the hole doesn't like me. it hit-ed the side
and bounced out, thats why that guy won 1 round against me 3-1.
the other 2 matches were kinda one sided, but still i had my chances.
just that i made stupid mistakes and didn't take my chances.
welll all in all; i enjoyed myself and gained lots of experience.
and P.s EDWIN LOST TO A GIRL 3-0 FLAT.
with regards to swee chuan; (swee hao;s bro)
congrats on getting 2nd, but still i don't know what went wrong
why did you lose to that person in the finals. to be frank
HE AINT GOOD. you are clearly better then him.
`
`
I'm in love with LIN JUN JIE; i'm like obsessedwith his songs now.
and i can't wait for his concert!! OMG ; and yet again
i'm in love with my blog song!!! the lyrics are great
and its what i feel.
`
`
butta don't worry, you just need to sort things out; ingrate i'm sorry about yesterday,sincerely.
LOSER i go find you tml okie, i'll drag u out at 10pm;xing we'll meet out for groupie soon :)
teddy lets go out tml!!! ; girl you make smile.
I care not where i go,
How i live,
How i endure,
When i sleep, I dream of you.
When i'm awake, your in my thoughts.
And when i'm tired,i'll wait; thats because i know we'll brighten each others day.
-smiles. -Question
would you rather be with a person whom you love; but not recieve as much love in return...
or with a person who loves you much more then you do to him? things aren't what it is already; u don't go out of the way for me anymore.
[`\___Jux.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\__x]
-dilemma
zhi yao ni sha jiao hui rang wo wei xiao :)
.Saturday, April 08, 2006 ' 2:37 AM Y
i love being around you
Well i got drawn into Group 2; DAMNSharik - National youth team best playerAnothony - A player with more experience and better then me (Break clear standered)Sharif - unknown player.Tml will be race to 3; Top 2 from each group.Lets see 0.1% against sharik, maybe 30% against anthony ; ?? % against sharifhopefully i don't get trashed 3-0, 3-0 ,3-0 AHAHAHAAHgetting a 1 will appease me =/Anyway i just hope i can play well tml; losing is okie,i just want to give my best shot; just to see how fairagainst players who are better then me, and in a tense enviroment.Anyway i'm kinda troubled right now;DAMN i hate this feeling, its like getting all over meand bringing me down. i don't want to feel this way.i don't. I JUST WANT TO SORT EVERYTHING OUT-brighten up my day will you? ;make me smiles.ice cream melt le; sun go down lebut elmo's still here;As i ponder upon this question; Would you be with some one you loveor with someone you are comfortable with? -comments :)P.s ingrate i'm sorry; alrights treat it as i'm brainless, hopess,uselss >.<don't just see what i see; but feel what i feel too?don't just look on my surfacebut see what i have in depth. -2.10ameverynight i pray that things would be greati thought it would be great.but i it wasn't.why can't you understand -talk to me will you?butta, i'm glad you're happy, i'm always here you know; loser sunday sunday pleasseexing, thanks for being there for me;[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]dilemma; shunned imissthosedays.
.Friday, April 07, 2006 ' 1:21 AM Y
i love being around you
I swear to myself; accounting sure is boring..today i was doing the accounts for aprilDAMN it; you know i had to redo the accounts 3 times.WHAT THE HELL? for the past months it onlytook me an hour each..this time it took 1/2 my dayand you know what the problem was?scenerio; GRRR why can't it balance? ohwells i'll do it againi might have keyed in something wrong;2nd time WHAT THE HELL? why is it still wrong*Starts to get pissed of* ALRIGHTS i'll do it again..i don't believe im that careless on the 3rd try..hours past; 'hey why u look so stress' ;I CAN'T TALLY THE BALANCE.ohh you got check if you got insert the transaction ma?'i never lei, why?' -checks- WHAT THE HELL..there was this transaction right at the bottom of the paper.; i photo copied so it was hard to see.Y$#&*%!#$! so i never did any mistakes; all i did was left out one transactionWHAT DA HELL.....Anyway after work; as usual i went to century for training.yes finally i see myself improving, but still im way below par.saturdays the competition already; hopefully i won't throw my face.anyway today i played with justin (p.s he won 2nd in a competion the day before)lets see the score was 7-1 ; HAHAHA atleast i got 1!! =Xthen i played with thomson; a 32 year old man with a newborn kid.the score was 4-5; yeahhh i was lucky i manage to win 4 rounds.he is good and to be honest; he is way better then me.P.s DADDY NO MORE NASI LEMAK IN THE MORNING; yesterday u made me poo early in the morningthat was more like chille lemak; and again!! the breakfast u bought today, made my get tummy ache..Butta i'm glad you're happy; and SEE i told you things would turn out fine; show some faith in your darling elmo... IM CUTE :) and i love ants.Loser i really really hope to see you on sunday...take off ke yi ma >.< ; mavis YES ITS FINALLY FRIDAY..THE END OF THE WEEK;somebody out there, i miss you, still do; someone smiles, please die, i mean please die smiling :) ; RONNIE DARLING, what broom did u use to sweep me off my feet? i know you're in L O V E with me...;jay i don't know you're condition, but im still praying.OH YA!! IM GETTING ANOTHER DOG!!! :)[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]when you don't need me, i'll stand asidebut when you need me, i'll be there for youbut still i wish you were by my side.
.Thursday, April 06, 2006 ' 12:34 PM Y
i love being around you
Geesh; its 2 more days till saturday!!COMPETITION DAY; excited yes, going to lose yes.HAHAHA; i'll pray hard about it,not to win; but not to embarress myself!.i want to have fun; fun being a loser.and damn; i lost to edwin again 7-2to be frank, i'm not doing very well,the only thing im doing well is; deceiving myself aboutme improving, which i don't see.I am totally lost whenever i play with him,is it meor are we on a different level, i don't want to lose!anyway i spoke to regina today; she said'life may get a lil screwed; but after sometime,everything will be back to normal' hopefully this happensbecause before i know anything; my worlds already crumbling down on me.OH YA, i did something cool in the office today.i slept during my lunch break because i was toosleepy and tired :S YAWNN.Dear 'somebody' -iliterally ;if you ever read this. can you message me can we go out everytime and just enjoy each others companycan i bite you whenever i'm downcan i call you in the middle of the night just to tell you my problemscan i pinch your nose and just laugh at you.can i beat your head because you're dumbcan i hold your hand because u walked the wrong way.can i?Dear 'Nobody' ; -literallycan you be my companion, can you be my confidente.can you not only see what i see ;but feel what i feel inside. can things go back to the way it was. can we just smile being with each other.can i be the one who wait on you. Dear 'My-body'Yes; i know i'm sexywith my 8o0 packs. damn im hot; call me bread pig, arnold shoot si nei ge,wonder bunnycall me Jeremy :)Regina thanks for the chat; mavis my darling, i told you im not mean.im so GOOD, and im replying HERE. ; ivan i ate your grandma too; teddy saturday alrights! watch the loser lose; butta i don't want to lose the bet.loser i don't care u must come on sunday, pretty please =Xbut i still will pray that both of us find out happiness; ingrate 2 words 'miss you' ;nobody 3 words 'miss you too'AHAHAAHA IM CUTE.[`\____Jux.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]when you don't need me; i'll stand asidebut when you need me; i'll be there for you.-are you happy with life? :S -im not.
.Wednesday, April 05, 2006 ' 12:12 AM Y
i love being around you
I'm so glad; not because of my daybut because its wednesday, RIGHT NOW.so that means i'm half way through my week;Excluding today; 2 more days of agonyand 2 more weeks of work; Today, work was boring as usual; BUTi had 1hour of msn time, and i pray hard thathappens again; with regards to chris,mavis,somone,and most of all butta;thanks for chatting with me; butta im gonna miss you next week.Anyway guess what, i fell asleep in the toilet :S
And i successfully accomplished the 10mins of fame.At first i was just sitting there; i poo-ed for the first 2minsand fell asleep for the remaining 8mins, =XAfter work i went out with jo,eve,xiang,daryl.Well i guess i had fun -ithink;we watched Fragile, which i thought was not bad :)the frequent shocks i received in the movie made melook like a loser; but yeah :)Competition is on saturday; holy mama, Somebody stop me!! -the mask style.my prayerDear Heavenly Father; i pray that You would give me a discern heartgrant me wisdom. And i still pray for the people -as usualAmen ;Talk to ya later daddy.my questionhave you ever thought of giving up somethingS you love mostfor a friendship? -i would; enlighten me.my thoughts
i waited;am still waiting ;i shoutedbut you never came back.my voice
i shouted but heard no reply; girl ar, life is different without you
you don't seem to need me ;i need you, always did
not as a substitute; not to past time. ;promise
Butta thanks for being there; edwin you too, i will go higher for sure; teddy *hugs* i'm always behind you;ivan show me some balls buddy -wheres kawai-ee; xiang follow your heart,sorry ;
marcus take care; jay , even thou i don't know who you are, but i'm praying, get well soon
ingrate where are you; someone out there smiles, always.miss ya ;Loser talk to me; will you? ; xing get back soon!
i actually 'planned' the events for today;
it was meant to be a suprise; but things changed. -
did you know?[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\____x]-Just where do i stand? what do i mean to you?-Dilemma ;
The feeling of not wanting to loseANYTHING
.Tuesday, April 04, 2006 ' 12:32 AM Y
i love being around you
I watched Hitch again today; there was this sentence which really caught my attentionit goes something like:'some people spend thier life searching for love''what they didn't know, it was always right infront of them''its just that they never realised it'THIS IS MY CURRENT FETISHits making me tear; :'(i'll sort things out :)[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]it wasn't me that left; it was you who drifted away.i was always waiting for you to come back.
.Monday, April 03, 2006 ' 10:58 PM Y
i love being around you
whats on earth is going on; somebody tell me,i'm in a daze, and the worlds spinning around.someobody tell whats going on;when i open my eyes i see nothing inside.i am a official 'loser' now; and all this things are getting on me.i try not to think about it; but still... DAMN.i can't play; i can't work; i can't smile..when i play i lose,when i work im in a daze,when i smile theres a tear in my eye,what the hells wrong with me.P.s I lost to edwin today; 5-2 5-1, Lost with no regretsfor i myself am LOST.Losers don't go playin hoping to win.they play to lose.Loser smile; edwin i got my style of playin, i'll ask when i need help; idiot ingrate, i miss ya :( ; butta im CUTE and HANDSOME; [`\____Jux.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]girl; where are u when i need you.
. ' 12:13 AM Y
i love being around you
JUST TAKE EVERYTHING FROM MEDAMN IT.you stripped me off everything i loved dearly; take iti plead, don't take the one thing thats most precious to me.for its the one thing i lov most.
for it its the thing i cherish most.
for it is the last thing i would want to lose.[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]my confessions.
. ' 12:02 AM Y
i love being around you
Lets see today was boring; -ithink.i was like rotting and rotting, and thenmaggots just started to crawl over me..eeks, anyway i went to play pool again.i wanna become better; i wanna prove myself.anyway i'm going for a competition this coming sat.one more week of training; DAMN.i seriously don't wanna lose badly;with the likes of amature's , national youths.and all of my friends who taught me century,man...i'm gonna get my ass kicked pretty badly.i'm like the lousiest over there; Dear Lord please have mercy on my soul :POHH YAA! ; i almost forgot. today while training;edwin had a match with me;it was race to 5. at first i was reluctantbecause i just changed my stroke,my shots and stuff.but after much consideration; i excepted the challenge.anyway the game was like a fairy tale;it started with me losing 1-o ,then 2-othen 3-othen 4-ooh my god; whats happening to me, 4-o damn i was telling myselfalrights lets just end it with 5-o so i don't need to pay so much :Sbut hey; things turned my way; i was praying really hard in my heart.DEAR LORD; please let me play well; and let edwin miss the 9ball.then things went 4-1 (hey i got 1 point; -a pat on the back)4-2 (i think i need pray harder; if i won the next rack things would be interesting)4-3 (ohh my its 4-3; i don't wanna lose)4-4 (yes yes the last rack; i need the 9 ball!!)5-4 (PRAISE THE LORD; i was desperate for the win)but hey; i'v got to admit i was crap at the start and then i started to get the hang of it.edwin; u say u get angry everytime u see my blog; hey i want to face you in the competition.its a gay date, i don't want to lose. By the way; i am obsessed with
The Click Five!!!!Lord let me have the same dream againpretty please, it's a weird dream i'v got to admit.but it was SWEET;yet impossible, if you think its you.its not, and if you think its not you; its you.i'll pray about it and i hope You'll answer.ingrate i know you miss me;teddy lets Pangy!! ;edwin please train harder...alrights i'll be humble!please DIE..joking; Loser cherish those around you;butta take care; pearly, so its a date..i want my shoes!! ;xiang happy birthday again; EVERYONE tag in one box ONLY ;[`\____Jux.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]girl, let me drift away with you; for i realised you were always there for me.right by my side.
.Sunday, April 02, 2006 ' 12:31 PM Y
i love being around you
It was a weird dream; but it felt so sweetyet so impossible, Dear Lord are u telling me something?i know; i'v been thinking about it lately too; help me.what does my heart want? >.<[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]-confused to the bits.
. ' 12:27 AM Y
i love being around you
oh man; i think im on a losing streak.i'm like losing to swee hao; which is not normal.and edwin is just getting more and more lucky.i played edwin today, i won 5-2 ;and lost 4-5oh my,i was suppose to win that game. and thats the second time i lost in that situation.but hey; i think i'm improving :) there's a competition coming up next week.but u don't know if i'm up to it.anyway i'm bored; and i'm gonna sleep soon.there she goes busy-ing again; and here i am waiting.well,i wonder what my plans are for tml;ohwells happy birthday xiang :)e.X.i.T will always be there for ya..and lastly; happy
NEW YEAR; -notHAPPY APRILS FOOL; belated. LOLfor t hose losers who have been pranked.OH YA; i think my background musics nice.
comment about it please, anyway i'm gonna
post some interesting topics soon; so stay tuned :)For a start; ponder upon this question.Are people still looking out for true love; or are they looking for someone who they can depend on.feel free to give your opinions.[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___x]they tell; and i listen, now i don't know what to do.i'm STUMPED -dilemma; INGRATE U SUCK.
.Saturday, April 01, 2006 ' 5:59 AM Y
i love being around you
OMG its 6am and im still not asleep..actually i'm going nowwnights peeps X)[`\___Jux.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\___]Share your thoughts with me;will you.
. ' 3:14 AM Y
i love being around you
oh my, i played pool till like, 2.30am?
training was really really tiring..
it was like tedious, but i think i'v learnt alot. i'm really exhausted and my body's aching away.
anyway i lost to edwin again; 5-4 , 5-4
what the hell? i don't want to lose anymore!!come back to me;will you?i miss the times we laughed and smiled together;do you?i'll scream, i'll be good this time roundi still pray;i do, i'm still me.[`\___JuX.ThE.SamE.oLd.eLmo`\____x]
ice cream melt le,sun go down le
but elmo's still here. ;ingrate i miss you.lots; butta stop eating ants;teddy choose between your left or right ballstop being indecisive! i know both are BIG, but choose one! ; surf and kawai-ee ; loser im longing to scold you!!
